PITCH ROOM

Post by **joni** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 8:54 am

A sheet of postage stamps, but they’re gum

yourfriendclaire · Post by **yourfriendclaire** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 8:55 am

Okay okay but how about this: a CAN of regular pinto beans, but then you open the can and it turns out every bean is a piece of gum

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 8:57 am

A gum magazine. The quiz? It's gum.

Post by **joni** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 8:58 am

A wallet and the ID, cards, and cash are gum

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:00 am

I patinated box of antique tin soldiers you found at a rummage sale? They're gum.

DUCKULA · Post by **DUCKULA** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:04 am

Del Taco salsa packet with two, Chiclet style, pieces of gum... Various spicy flavors with “Del Scorcho” being the obvious favorite.

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:06 am

DUCKULA wrote: ↑Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:04 am Del Taco salsa packet with two, Chiclet style, pieces of gum... Various spicy flavors with “Del Scorcho” being the obvious favorite.

This is a well thought out pitch. Kudos, duckula.

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:14 am

Cereal, which is gum.

Post by **joni** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:15 am

saran’s world-famous wrap, but it’s sheets of gum

kmikeym · Post by **kmikeym** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:18 am

a gun, but the bullets are gum, and the firing mechanism acts like a mouth full of teeth so that when the gum is fired it's soft and wet

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:18 am

Gross!

yourfriendclaire · Post by **yourfriendclaire** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:26 am

kmikeym wrote: ↑Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:18 am a gun, but the bullets are gum, and the firing mechanism acts like a mouth full of teeth so that when the gum is fired it's soft and wet

VERY Cronenberg

Post by **joni** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:31 am

Surgical mask but is gum

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:48 am

jonathan_stick wrote: ↑Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:31 am Surgical mask but is gum

I like the serves-multiple-purposes approach.

Post by **joni** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 9:58 am

Experiential: a fabric store, but each bolt is yards of gum

X lace gum
X houndstooth gum
X gingham gum
X 100% silk gum
X novelty seasonal patterned cotton gum (Halloween)

Which brings us to: gum clothes

ritchey · Post by **ritchey** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 10:02 am

David Cronenberg, but made of gum and not sentient
gum husband
one shoe is gum and one is mouth
gum glasses (*can only look at gum)
dear gum

alexshred420 · Post by **alexshred420** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 11:46 am

Dude Ranch, but it's cum

Post by **joni** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 12:02 pm

alexshred420 wrote: ↑Fri Apr 03, 2020 11:46 am Dude Ranch, but it's cum

BANNED

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 12:31 pm

Gum baby. It is a doll and it is made of gum. Maybe it comes with a gum-pacifier? Though I'm not married to that.

RCH · Post by **RCH** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 12:39 pm

Gag gum: you offer someone a stick and they find out it's not gum.

Post by **joni** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 12:46 pm

USB-G, gum for your computer

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 1:18 pm

Baby gum. It's real little. Don't give gum to babies; they can choke.

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 1:21 pm

Theme song: "Babies love it, baby gum. Baby gum is baby sized. It's just the right size for a baby! (Warning: baby gum is not for babies."

Phil · Post by **Phil** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 1:41 pm

A countertop bread machine like peoples' parents had in the 90s
but it makes loaves of gum

that you slice into bread sized gum slices and send with the kids for school lunch.

RCH · Post by **RCH** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 1:55 pm

"Hair you can chew!"--Realistic gum hairpiece

Post by **joni** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 2:05 pm

m o l l y wrote: ↑Fri Apr 03, 2020 1:21 pm Theme song: "Babies love it, baby gum. Baby gum is baby sized. It's just the right size for a baby! (Warning: baby gum is not for babies."

Look what I found on an old hard drive:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/j6y021e05xrt1 ... m.mp3?dl=0

(it's the radio commercial for baby gum)

morgan · Post by **morgan** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 2:47 pm

8x10 piece of gum.

richjensen · Post by **richjensen** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 3:06 pm

Smart Gum keeps track of chews and records caloric jaw burn. Gum stuck under tables provides mesh network to identify chewers by their distinct mastication profile.

richjensen · Post by **richjensen** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 3:06 pm

Gum that glows in the dark. Anklets and bracelets of gum.

richjensen · Post by **richjensen** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 3:07 pm

Fountain of gum brings people back to the heart of the city.

richjensen · Post by **richjensen** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 3:08 pm

Euthanasia gum for informal departures.

richjensen · Post by **richjensen** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 3:11 pm

1:100 scale Las Vegas in gum.

richjensen · Post by **richjensen** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 3:11 pm

Lego Gum (for real)

kmikeym · Post by **kmikeym** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 5:01 pm

The gums (or gingiva) of a human mouth, but made of chewed pink gum. And the teeth are chiclets.

kmikeym · Post by **kmikeym** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 5:03 pm

gum news you might have missed from last December:

https://www.confectionerynews.com/Artic ... ing-shapes

yourfriendclaire · Post by **yourfriendclaire** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 5:03 pm

jonathan_stick wrote: ↑Fri Apr 03, 2020 2:05 pm
m o l l y wrote: ↑Fri Apr 03, 2020 1:21 pm Theme song: "Babies love it, baby gum. Baby gum is baby sized. It's just the right size for a baby! (Warning: baby gum is not for babies."
Look what I found on an old hard drive:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/j6y021e05xrt1 ... m.mp3?dl=0

(it's the radio commercial for baby gum)

I don’t think enough attention is being paid to this masterpiece

RCH · Post by **RCH** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 5:06 pm

The jingle made me remember that I did see this commercial. I always thought it was weird that the gum was called Baby Gum, but you weren't supposed to give it to babies because it was a choking hazard.

jonathan_stick wrote: ↑Fri Apr 03, 2020 2:05 pm
m o l l y wrote: ↑Fri Apr 03, 2020 1:21 pm Theme song: "Babies love it, baby gum. Baby gum is baby sized. It's just the right size for a baby! (Warning: baby gum is not for babies."
Look what I found on an old hard drive:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/j6y021e05xrt1 ... m.mp3?dl=0

(it's the radio commercial for baby gum)

yourfriendclaire · Post by **yourfriendclaire** » Fri Apr 03, 2020 5:12 pm

Gum, but IT chews YOU

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Sat Apr 04, 2020 1:44 am

jonathan_stick wrote: ↑Fri Apr 03, 2020 2:05 pm
m o l l y wrote: ↑Fri Apr 03, 2020 1:21 pm Theme song: "Babies love it, baby gum. Baby gum is baby sized. It's just the right size for a baby! (Warning: baby gum is not for babies."
Look what I found on an old hard drive:
https://www.dropbox.com/s/j6y021e05xrt1 ... m.mp3?dl=0

(it's the radio commercial for baby gum)

HOLY SHIT, YOU ARE SHITTING ME. Jona, are we the ...(said together) same person?

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Sat Apr 04, 2020 10:23 am

Really, though. I am not over this.

RCH · Post by **RCH** » Mon Apr 06, 2020 5:15 pm

"Babies LOVE it! Baby Gum... It's just the right size for babies."

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Sat Apr 11, 2020 1:52 am

How about a ball of gum the size of meadows's beet that you just let chill on the counter and then, when you're ready, you just pick it up and take a bite out of it, like an apple?

ritchey · Post by **ritchey** » Sat Apr 11, 2020 9:24 am

gum underwear
gumderwear

Phil · Post by **Phil** » Sat Apr 11, 2020 10:26 am

Phil · Post by **Phil** » Sat Apr 11, 2020 10:28 am

(unrelated to gum:)

meadows · Post by **meadows** » Sat Apr 11, 2020 10:45 am

m o l l y wrote: ↑Sat Apr 11, 2020 1:52 am How about a ball of gum the size of meadows's beet that you just let chill on the counter and then, when you're ready, you just pick it up and take a bite out of it, like an apple?

or roast the whole steak of gum for 3 hours in the oven

m o l l y · Post by **m o l l y** » Sat Apr 11, 2020 11:06 am

Phil wrote: ↑Sat Apr 11, 2020 10:28 am (unrelated to gum:)

Bulletproof??!!

Post by **joni** » Sat Apr 11, 2020 5:23 pm

gum dog
gum oakleys
gum dog oakleys (best)

Post by **joni** » Sat Apr 11, 2020 5:37 pm

@Phil, can you please make a large format version of Dog Gum for this project I just saw? They’ll print it out real big (30”x40”) and wheat paste it on a publicly-facing wall on an apartment building in Providence.

https://post-contact.site/

Phil · Post by **Phil** » Sat Apr 11, 2020 6:23 pm

U got it babe